The most devoted Fifty Shades fans know that today (June 18) is Christian Grey's birthday, and that means it is also the arrival of Grey, E.L. James' latest installment in the Fifty Shades series—but told from Christian's perspective, for a change. As expected, the book is chock full of racy and erotic text, the most bizarre of which have been making the rounds on Twitter today. We've collected nine examples that were as painful and mortifying to re-type here as they were to read in the first place. Also, NSFW (obviously).
"An image of her shackled to my bench, peeled ginger root inserted in her ass so she can't clench her buttocks, comes to mind, followed by judicious use of a belt or strap."
Our thoughts: Peeled ginger root? No, no, no, no, NO.
"It's been a long time since I've seen pubic hair up close and personal like this. I tug it gently."
Our thoughts: The tugging of pubic hair seems wildly unappealing.
"She smells on Ana and apples and sex."
Our thoughts: What a combo.
"Her sharp intake of breath is music to my dick."
Our thoughts: Just LOL.
"I'm going to make you come like a freight train baby."
Our thoughts: Thank you for your efforts, but no.
"She has a fresh, wholesome fragrance that reminds me of my grandfather's apple orchard."
Our thoughts: He's dangerously close to ruining apples for us.
"As she tells me she likes her tea weak and black, for a moment I think she's describing what she likes in a man."
Our thoughts: Get your head out of the gutter, Grey.
"Lifting my hips, I grab my cock. 'I want you to become well-acquainted, on first-name terms, if you will, with my favorite and most cherished part of my body.'"
Our thoughts: Really? We would have never guessed.
"Oh, this ass is mine, so mine. And it's going to get warmer."
Our thoughts: We prefer our asses at room temperature, thanks.
Will you read Grey?
Source : http://feeds.glamour.com/c/35377/f/665037/s/475e418c/sc/15/l/0L0Sglamour0N0Centertainment0Cblogs0Cobsessed0C20A150C0A60Cbest0Elines0Efrom0Egrey0Ee0El0Ejames/story01.htm
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